hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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