is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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