I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
