he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
tell me about the fingering
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
