Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
