called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
