It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
