Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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