Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
