i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
