Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
