we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
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