I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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