when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
