Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
