He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I'm both gender and math confused
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
