it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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