So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
