me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize
