Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
