he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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