physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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