Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize