I am puke
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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