this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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