You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
