ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
