I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
