"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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