the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
you made out with another girl for some wings
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
