the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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