i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
