In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
