yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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