I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
it was like eating out sand paper
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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