is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
