Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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