fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
