My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
