big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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