he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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