she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
