Redeem this text for a blowjob
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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