Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize