i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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