It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
