id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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