I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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