I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
