My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
