But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize